Friday, 12 October 2012

From the desk of Alice - Day 324

My Dearest Friends,

The weather grows cold since our last correspondence. The trees have transformed their leaves into bright colours and put them at a more reasonable level for me to play with them. Often the Food Giant takes me outside and "blows bubbles" to amuse herself. I must admit that the bubbles amuse me with their colours and lead me to wonder if I could use it as part of my weather control machine. More on that later.

The Giants continue to thwart my efforts at escape. They have added a Debabyized Zone (DBZ) around the fireplace. The Fuzzy Giant refers to it as the Go-Go Cage. I am not amused. I was hoping to use the chimney as a route of escape since I learned of a fat man that regularly uses it as a means of accessing residences.

The training of The Giants continues to progress. I have taught them rudimentary hand signs for "finished", "milk" and "for the love of diapers give me more meat". Unfortunately simple signs like "obtain 100 m of copper wire for my weather control machine" continue to not be understood. In order to fabricate the parts I need I was forced to take apart my crib's mobile during one of my "naportunities", as The Giants refer to it. Lamentably they discovered my modifications to the mobile and confiscated it before I was able to complete my work.

I have been trying to recruit allies and grow support for my plans. My two trusted lieutenants are Mr. Duckie and Bashful Beige Bunny, or "B Cubed" as he's known on the street. They are quite loyal, but I fear that they have beans for brains. I'll have to keep my master plan to myself in order to guarantee success.

I've gained some tiny ivory knives, or "teeth" as The Giants refer to them. Two center bottom and 2 top incisors, although the incisors seem to have come and gone. I was using the bottom ones to mark the passage of time on my crib rail until the giants added a wrapping to the rail.

Another ability I've gained is a power of the Gods! I can control light itself. One of the drawbacks currently is that one of The Giants has has to hold me close to a electromagnetic radiation enabling lever (The Giants prefer to use the obtuse name of "light switch") to operate it.

Alas, I must say adieu. Until next time,
Yours dearly,
Alice

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